Belgian Beer is the best in the world. Sure that notion is open for debate, however in an actual debate with actual beer people the conclusion that “Belgian Beer is the best in the world” is typically achieved in less than five minutes. Belgian Beer would destroy every Beer Economy there is if no laws were put in play to prevent Belgian Beer from entering that country.
Reinheitsgebot is the best example of such a law. Like Lebensraum and Kristallnacht, Reinheitsgebot is a German word that we Anglophiles joyfully struggle to verbalize. The awkward guttural nature and complete lack of grammar laws make German amusing to us, as if swine are trying to talk to us. Reinheitsgebot is also referred as “The German Purity Law of 1516.”
Lots of places that make beer like to say they follow “The German Purity Law of 1516.” They like to say that the law was put in play to ensure that only barley, hops, water and yeast are used in making beer. Despite the fact Germans had not idea yeast existed until a Frenchman told them so. This notion is greatly Goebbelsized.
The real purpose of Reinheitsgebot was to keep Belgian Beer out of Germany. Belgian Beer is factorially superior to German Beer; therefore people would much rather drink Belgian Beer. Instead of pulling teeth, which is a common way for Germans to generate wealth, the greedy Huns decided to ban Belgian Beer all together. This allowed their inferior German Beer to be consumed by the at large public which enjoyed Belgian Beer much, much more.
The Germans further took out their disdain for Belgian Beer by invading Belgium several times and destroying their Beer Making Centers in a scorched earth campaign that would make General Sherman’s March to the Sea seem like an unorganized temper tantrum. The destruction of their country did not stop the Belgians from making better beer than any other country. In fact, it inspired them to one day take over the World Beer Economy. This is known as the Schlieffen Plan.
This day has come. Jupiler is rumored to be unleashed on Wisconsin soon. Jupiler would be the “knockout punch” that the stagnant Wisconsin Beer Economy has feared for the past decade. We must stop this from happening. That is if we value the Wisconsin Beer Economy. Join us in our fight against Belgian Beer.
The first six paragraphs are an example of propaganda. Sure there are some facts in them, but the primary goal is to use fear to get you to believe something. Fear is a very strong motive. If you are afraid you are not thinking clearly.
Jupiter is already in Wisconsin. It is called something else. If you dig hard enough you’ll find out exactly what I’m talking about.
The whole Beer Subculture is very complex and it may sound like I know what I’m talking about. I do not. I’m not in and never have been in the industry. I simply go out to the bars three to four nights a week and spent around fifteen dollars a night.
Fifteen bucks can mean two pints or fifteen bucks can mean three pitchers. I drink different beers. I get curious. I ask questions. I research my questions. I surround myself with information. I don’t homebrew nor do I work for anyone whose primary goal is to sell beer.
A week or so ago I heard rumblings about this new beer law that would happen to Wisconsin. I talked to some people who had an understanding of what was happening.
Dave Hoops, of Fitger’s Brewhouse in Duluth, said that Wisconsin has “…the most liberal, most friendly, most all encompassing beautiful beer laws in the country.”
Rick Sauer, formally of Twin Ports currently with Brady’s Brewhouse, said, “When I started there weren’t any limitations. You could have a brewery with a tasting room, restaurant, you could self distribute, you could just do whatever, cuz Wisconsin is all about beer. Which is awesome.”
Leos Frank, the Czech born brewer behind Eau Claire’s Lazy Monk, said “Losing self disturbing right would be devastating for me. It could actually put me out of business. So that’s my biggest concern.”
Jim Wiesender, Sand Creek Brewing Company, was nice enough to talk to me for about an hour at Willow River Blues and Brews in New Richmond. His interview is worth listening to if you’d like a better understanding what is going on. Highlights include: “What I find extraordinary stealthy about this whole thing is how it was slide into the budget.” “It should have never got introduced into the budget, because of this now we’re scrambling with only two weeks’ notice.” “For me it falls into the Chicken Little the sky is falling thing, but I’m a small brewer.” “If this is a threat to Wisconsin, I have a hard time believing this.” “You start to have to ask yourself, what is going on here?” “Why do they want to take our wholesaling away from us?” “It squelches business is what this really does.” “It needs to have open debate; it affects a lot of businesses.” “The politicians have been sold a bill of goods; they are not listening to the small guy.” “The craft brewing segment is adding jobs to Wisconsin.” “I can’t point a finger at the Governor on this one because this guy is all about jobs. He may be our last line of defense going this is a bad thing for Wisconsin. Bang. Give me the red marker we’re gonna knock it out. We sincerely hope he does this if it gets that far. We’re hoping we come up with a good compromise.” “Don’t mess with the small guy.”
Off the record someone told me, “Its bullshit. The wholesalers pull this kinda shit every few years. Powerful lobbyists.”
Another off the record quote. “What I do is all about Beer Culture, all the different styles and all. This would destroy Beer Culture. ”
To return to the German bashing of paragraphs 2, 3, 4, and 5 I’ll now quote Pastor Martin Niemoller: “First they came for the Jews and I didn’t speak out because I wasn’t a Jew. Then they came for the Unions and I didn’t speak out because I wasn’t in a Union. Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak out for me.”
