UWEC Homecoming

If you’re from a town smaller than Eau Claire there is a ton a stuff to do in Eau Claire. If you’re from a town larger than Eau Claire there is nothing to do in Eau Claire. If you’re from Eau Claire you’ve already done everything to do in Eau Claire.

This axiom is how I sum up what people think of Eau Claire options for entertainment. Relative to the Twin City suburbs there is nothing really new or exciting, however relative to Rusk County there is a bounty of activities to engage in. And if you grew up in the area you’ve already been everywhere done everything. There is a low dose of everything in Eau Claire.

I’m a simple person. All I need for a good time is a bar stool, a beer, and maybe some peanuts. A good song on the jukebox helps but isn’t necessary. Typically I don’t like crowds; just a bunch of cattle lunging from one end of the pen to the other in hopes of finding some more feed. Despite my old man attitude, “A Heavy Dose of Chaos” is fun from time to time.

UWEC Homecoming qualifies as “A Heavy Dose of Chaos.” It isn’t the “Near-Lethal Dose of Chaos” that is: Mifflin Block Party, La Crosse Oktoberfest, Chilton Beer Fest, any Badger Game Day in Madison, or Packer Superbowl Victory. UWEC Homecoming, like any college Homecoming, is a manageable foray into chaos. You’re not sure what will happen, but you’ve got a pretty good idea what the day will have in store: getting up too early, beer, foul language, a parade, lawn games, some talk of going to the game, not going to the game, nap, shitty food, going out to the bars and maybe getting laid by someone you don’t even know(but probably not). In other words, my kinda day.

I like to get an early start on things so I went out Thursday Night. A new art exhibit, Domesticity, opened on campus which gave the many intellectuals of the city something to do. There was also a Metal Show at the House of Rock and a Blues Show at The Firehouse. And Firedancers at Phoenix Park. Never underestimate the Adderall fueled joy of Firedancing.

Friday brought preparation for Saturday. Everyone was erecting bright orange snow fences around their rented propriety. This is done both to keep elements of authority that haunt the day out of their party and the cattle of rando drunk people from spilling over on to the sidewalks. Friday also had a Reggae Show at the House of Rock and a Rock Show at The Mousetrap.

Saturday was the day. People having sex in the streets. Well not quite, but there was a lot of celebrating going on. The coffee shop, where everyone goes to talk about the movie they’re writing and/or the latest series of Avant-grade Dutch Impressionist woodcuts to be leaked onto the internet, decided they would close. Not a bad idea. Someone did die as a result of Water Street Bathroom Cleanliness on a Homecoming a few years back.

For the majority of the population the day went like the end of paragraph three I’m sure. Being “the go everywhere do everything guy” I made it out to the Foster Cheese Haus for their beer and cheese tasting. That was a classy event and provided a good contrast to the debauchery that was Water Street.
If I want to do a beer radio show I need to class up the heathens and remind the upper crust to Dionysus it up from time to time. There is plenty to of things to do in Eau Claire.